Final Salute

John Frank “Skip” Hetling was born on December 16, 1933 into a Polish American family in Beacon, NY. He was the oldest of four children, three boys followed by a baby girl. While he had many responsibilities as the oldest child, he was also always a jokester, once betting the other eighth grade boys at St. Joachim Elementary School that his kindergarten sister could climb to the top of the school flagpole. He won the bet. And they both got in trouble.
Following graduation from St. Patrick’s High School across the ferry from Beacon in Newburgh, New York, John joined the service. He was a proud member of the Seabees of the Navy from February 9, 1954 until his honorable discharge on October 14, 1960. He also continued to work at the family business, Hetling Brothers Plumbing and Heating. Later, he began to acquire and manage local rental properties where he served as landlord, superintendent and sometimes counselor to his tenants. For a time, he also taught plumbing to inmates at the Fishkill Correctional Facility.
On August 26th 1967, he married Irene Tomashosky, a Ukrainian American woman who was introduced to him by his future sister-in-law, a bartender at his local watering hole. For their first date, he took her skiing and, in an attempt at chivalry, he pointed out a smooth patch of snow she could walk on. As it turns out, the snow was smooth because it covered a small creek that was not fully frozen. John ended up buying Irene new pants and underwear on that first date.
The couple went on to have three daughters, of whom John was extremely proud. His daughters have fond memories of helping him maintain the rental properties, enjoying apple pancakes and polka music on Sunday mornings, and grabbing Daddy an ice cold beer from the freezer after a long day.
John was a man of faith who attended Mass with his family every Sunday. He was a member of the Knights of Columbus and served as a Grand Knight from 1959-1960.
As he got older and closer to retirement, John spent a lot of time bringing water and provisions to the Appalachian trail through-hikers in his backyard, earning him the nickname “Big John.” He was quiet, yet funny. Reserved but welcoming. His nature helped him make friends everywhere he went.
Eventually the rental properties were all sold and John and Irene were able to fulfill their dream of buying a retirement home in Merida, Mexico. They initially fell in love with Mexico after a family vacation to Acapulco many years before. The family subsequently enjoyed many trips to Mexico where they spent some of their happiest times together. John and Irene traveled far and wide after retirement, but always returned to Mexico.
When travel became a bit more difficult, John and Irene settled back in New Jersey full time, where all of their children and eight grandchildren live. John was a wonderful and loving grandfather who never failed to make his grandchildren laugh. He was happiest when spending time with them and they all loved him very, very much.
On May 3, 2021, John suffered a massive stroke from which he never fully recovered. His family is grateful for the time they had with him after his stroke where he showed them unfailing strength and determination. The care provided by his wife Irene in the twelve and a half months after his stroke was a remarkable and priceless example to his children and grandchildren of true love. On a daily basis, Irene quietly showed that indeed “Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.”
On May 25th, 2022, John died and returned to his Father in Heaven. He is survived by his wife Irene (née Tomashosky), daughters Andrea (Roman), Tasia (Marcus) and Kristina (Richard), grandchildren Sofia, Lukian, Maximilian, Xavier, Sonia, Grayson, Anna and Natalia, brother Leo (Peggy), sister Helene, and many loving nieces, nephews and cousins. He was predeceased by his parents John and Helen Hetling, his brother-in-law Norm and his brother Francis.
Memorial calling hours will be held on Monday May 30th from 4-8pm at the McHoul Funeral Home, Inc. 895 Route 82 Hopewell Junction, NY 12533. A Mass of Christian Burial will be held at St. Denis Church 10am Tuesday May 31st, followed by burial in St. Denis Cemetery.
In lieu of flowers, donations in memory of John Hetling may be made to VNA Health Group, Attn: Philanthropy Department, 23 Main Street, Suite D, Holmdel, NJ 07733 or vnahg.org/memorial-gifts-and-gifts-in-honor/ Please specify that you would like your gift directed to hospice care or area of greatest need. Donations may also be made to the Ukrainian Catholic Church of the Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary 684 Alta Vista Place, Perth Amboy, NJ 08861, assumptioncatholicchurch.net.
Published by McHoul Funeral Home, Inc. – Hopewell Junction on May 25, 2022.