Final Salute

Howard Ellsworth Jessen died at age 96 surrounded by his loving children, Art, Ned and Gwen on September 29, 2021. His family is full of gratitude for so many years with this wonderful man, and is also heartbroken to lose such a dear father, grandfather, great grandfather, brother, uncle and irreplaceable friend.

Howard’s unique and beautiful personal qualities will make us miss him the most. One of them was the way he made deep, personal connections with people of all ages, through his genuine interest in everything they cared about, including the details of their lives. He related to everybody so naturally, and made all of us feel very important to him.

He was gentle, observant, a good listener, a teacher, a problem-solver, funny, and as wonderful a companion as anyone could be. His range as a conversationalist was peerless. His impressive curiosity contributed to his enjoyment of all subjects, he wanted to learn from everyone he talked to, was so sharp and intelligent, and also very humble.

One granddaughter chose two words to describe Howard: Kindness and Wonder. She plans to honor Howard through her own kindness to people and by heightening her sense of wonder. The rest of the family will do its best to follow. The exceptionally beautiful and heartwarming comments written by that granddaughter three days after Howard died appear at the end of the obituary.

Howard was born in Omaha, NE on September 4, 1925 to Arthur and Gertrude Ellsworth Jessen, whose own parents emigrated to the US from Denmark, Norway and England. Two years later his sister Eleanor Higson was born. Howard’s father died when Howard was 11 years old. When Howard’s sister developed asthma, their mother moved the young family to beautiful La Canada, CA.

After completing high school in Pasadena, CA, the US Navy sent Howard to the University of Texas in Austin through the Navy’s V-12 officer college education program for one year, then transferred him to the California Institute of Technology (Caltech) where he received his degree in civil engineering in 1946. He was discharged to the Naval Reserve upon graduation, taught courses to returning WWII GI’s, and was later called to serve in the Korean War on a troop ship, an experience that meant a great deal to him.

Howard thrived at Caltech, enjoying its stimulating curriculum and his gifted classmates. Howard’s first class on his first day of school was calculus. “The teacher, subject, and my mindset all converged, and I was transported into another world as soon as I began to understand the math. It changed my world, not in a quantitative way, but it was something new and marvelous that I couldn’t believe,” he reported to Caltech years later. Because of his gratitude for such a life-changing experience, Howard gave back to the school by endowing the Howard E. and Susanne C. Jessen Postdoctoral Instructorship in the Humanities, and also as a volunteer for decades through his leadership of the local Caltech Alumni Association and recruitment program. He continued his 70 year connection to Caltech into his 90s.

Other degrees included a master’s degree in engineering at USC, and later an MBA from the University of Chicago’s Executive Program, now Chicago Booth. Even after a long day at work, Howard always looked forward to his evening classes with talented professors and accomplished fellow students.

Howard met his late wife, Susanne “Susie” Carson Jessen, through his sister. Eleanor and Susie were in the same sorority at the University of California at Berkeley when Howard was taking graduate classes there. Coincidentally, Susie lived in Omaha, NE during her childhood. Howard and Susie became better acquainted when they both returned from the west coast to Omaha where they married in 1950. Susie was the love and light of Howard’s life for more than 60 years of marriage.

Howard and Susie made a wonderful life for their family, which started in Berkeley, CA, followed by a move to Glenview, IL for Howard’s work, and ended with their final move to Winnetka, IL. Their children, two of their children’s spouses, and two grandchildren attended nearby North Shore Country Day (NSCD), which came to be Howard’s “school,” too. He served in many leadership roles on the board of trustees and on its foundation board while his children attended NSCD. In later years, using his engineering skills, Howard coached middle schoolers for Science Olympiad, helping them build towers, bridges and booms for almost two decades.

After 39 years, Howard retired from Ceco Corporation in 1987 where he last served as Senior Vice President of Planning and Development. He started as a draftsman, and worked his way to an executive leadership position on the senior management team. Since it was important to him to maintain his engineering credentials, he took certification classes into his early 90s, and was ranked # 1 in the state of Nebraska as the longest practicing engineer. For many years, he was the oldest student in the room, and also as well informed and engaged as his much younger classmates.

Having such a curious mind meant Howard’s passions were unlimited. Just a few of them included music (opera, symphony, jazz), language, history, mathematics, nature, meteorology, maps, astronomy, reading, track, dogs and children. Playing jazz piano from the Big Band era was like breathing for Howard. He started learning French when he retired, and was still going to class with his dear teacher and classmates just a few weeks before he died. He knew everything about WWII. While at summer camp in Minnesota, a counselor introduced Howard to bird-watching, which he enjoyed his entire life. High mountain peaks captivated him. Talking to the neighborhood children kept him young.

In addition to his three children, Howard is survived by his sister and his daughters-in-law Diane Jessen and Lynn Jessen, son-in-law Steve Gilmore, and his grandchildren, their spouses, great grandchildren, and Steve’s daughters and their children. Grandchildren are Chris, Brian (Ashley), Margaret Kelley (Jonathan), Parlin and Paula (fiancé Peter). Great grandchildren are Wells, Kinzie, Harrison, Wyatt, Maverick, Edgar, Gweneth and Pauline. Steve’s children are Amanda Kenefick (Billy), Meredith Ramirez (Julio), Jessica Myers and Sheridan Gilmore. Their children are Adelyn, Charlotte, Leo, Elena and Estéban.

The Jessen family is very grateful to Carolyn, Sirlene, Joseph and Norah who looked after Howard for two years before he died. He was able to stay in his own home because of them, enjoying life in a familiar, peaceful place where he could keep close memories of his beloved Susie.

Howard’s life will be celebrated at a later date. In lieu of flowers, please make a contribution in his memory to the organization listed below, or support a cause of your own:

North Shore Country Day, Development Dept, 310 Green Bay Rd, Winnetka, IL 60093. Please write “Jessen Family Scholarship Fund” in the memo line of your check. Or make a gift online at www.nscds.org/give in memory of Howard Jessen.

With love and gratitude from the Jessen family.

*Please read the remarks below by one of Howard’s granddaughters.*

If I had to pick two words to describe my Grandfather Howard, it would be these two:

Kindness.

And Wonder.

Howard had a kindness to him that came from the center of his being. He was gentle and careful with others. If the Golden Rule says to treat others as you would have them treat you, then Howard’s Rule might be to treat others as Howard treated them – with tenderness and compassion. His nature filled the air around him, and it made us kinder to each other when we were with him, or even when we thought of him.

Howard saw the world through eyes of wonder. He was enchanted by every part of it. He laughed and cried easily – equally moved and delighted by elements other people might miss: a particular symphony, the ways the leaves on a maple tree changed colors, or a young child’s turn of phrase. This wonder was contagious. When we were around him, we, too, looked for stories to share that we could all be transported by.

Howard’s kindness and wonder shone when he engaged with the world. He would pause to talk to the neighbor’s children, full of questions and interest for their lives. He would pause to visit with a beautiful yellow lab walking by, sharing his trademark, “Say, Brown Dog,” (which I am unable to replicate no matter how much I practice). People who talked to him felt loved and essential, because they were warmed by his attention.

When I woke up the day after he died, the world felt a little darker. It felt a little less kind, a little less full of wonder. And a fresh wave of grief washed over me as I felt the absence of his light.

But at the same time, I knew it was the same world he had loved and been enchanted by. The world hadn’t changed just because he wasn’t in it.

And in that same moment, I realized I could do something I hadn’t known I could do before: I could make the world kinder and more full of wonder, also. And that maybe in his loss, I could keep him close to me in the best way possible. I could be kind. I could see wonder. And even if I’ll never be exactly like him – I’ll never be able to fully fill his shoes – maybe there are enough of us left behind who want to. And maybe – together – we can fill the place that he left with our light. The light we learned to shine from him.

Kindness.

And Wonder.